sporadic thought bubbles

I’ve been going to the gym on a not-so-regular basis for the past 5 months. I’m sure nobody noticed, cause nothing much has changed in terms of body type or stamina. That’s mainly because I’ve been going an average of 5 times a month, staying there probably two hours, max, each time. Those are the days when I am motivated by sheer guilt over the money I’m throwing away, and feel the need to sweat two thousand bucks worth in one day.

I’ve tried out a number of different group exercise classes in hopes of finding my perfect fit. Just figured some of youse might be interested to hear about them.

BODY BALANCE - the class I attended the most. It is a little bit of everything: yoga, pilates, taichi…This was fun mainly because I enjoyed the music. Imagine exercising to “Fix You” by Coldplay. Talk about imagination. Sometimes the drama of the music intertwined with the drama of the poses brings tears to my eyes. Hehehe. Not even kidding. Theabelle’s favorite class also. May rapport na sha sa instructor.

PILATES - I did this once and thought it was nice, a lot of stretching and contorting into different but not necessarily graceful positions. Might try again if schedule permits. Warning: do not try this on a particularly heavy period day. With the opening of your legs wide and up in the air, the awareness that your perineal area is on display is quite unnerving.

YOGILATES - I thought this would be easier since it’s yoga-based, but NO. Aside from the uber-cool name which I would
love to say I’m doing (”I’m off to Yogilates!” –> how much more Newport could you get?!) , I really have no other reason to do it again. Besides, my classmates were just so good at it! I looked like an awkward gosling lost in a sea of amazingly limber geese. Talk about cool similes.

BODY JAM - This is a total dance class, with funky choreography and loud music. I was scared to try this initially, cause when I watched it through the glass it looked super hard and complicated. Surprisingly, it wasn’t. I had so much fun! If only I could use the choreography in real-life clubbing without looking like a total dork slash Romy and Michelle wannabe.

BODY COMBAT - Thea and Lia warned me that this might be a little too physical for me, but I liked it! Maybe cause the instructor was this big bald gay man (no, not ilie), with bulging muscles, who, after telling us to jab jab punch kick, would suddenly do a shimmy or a big ala-Fame slide to the floor, the gayest moves ever! It was also fun to watch the two feeling macho guys there, who were SO into punching, down to their Rocky-like facial expressions.

BELLY DANCING - One of the reasons I joined fitness. I really wanted to learn belly dancing. Unfortunately, it didn’t feel like much of a workout. It’s fun if you feel like just letting loose and making use of your excess flabs around the waist area. But when you look at how the instructor’s abdomen isn’t exactly how you want yours to look, you might change your mind about making this class your one workout.

I think that’s about everything I’ve tried. The funniest thing about going to the gym is seeing all these people sweating it out around you. Despite my scoliosis and accepted lack of athletic skills, I wasn’t the most pathetic-looking, thank God. The saddest thing, though, is seeing all these forty or fifty-something women with smaller waists and toned arms go through their workouts without so much as a huff and a puff. It appears that the only ace up my sleeve, YOUTH, doesn’t amount to much after all. With multiple childbirths and at least twenty years separating us, they still manage to make me look like the same old lampa-rita that I’ve always been. Hahaha.

Someday, I too will don that Nike bra top that the little old lady with 80’s style hair regularly wears to the gym. For now, I’ll stick to my oversized shirts and jogging pants, true fashion-victim that I am, while getting my father’s money’s worth of free iced tea and pretending to know how to work the machinery.

I think I’ve done ten Kai years worth of exercise in five months. I may have to take a five-year hiatus from the healthy lifestyle and resume in 2011.

Anyone interested in a Fitness First account? Hehehe.