sporadic thought bubbles

Since I
missed out on the college experience due to the “wonderful innovation” that is
the INTARMED program, I was quite the late-bloomer in the partying scene. While
my other (normal) friends were already “so over” the passing out in public
places thing, I covertly had an unhealthy level of curiosity. I practically
only started drinking in my mid-twenties, bashfully hiding my girlish giggles
behind those tiny cocktail umbrellas. So forgive me for being 26 years old, and
having only learned these crucial life lessons over the past few months.

Alcohol is
the perfect alibi. It absolves you from anything: the ten missed calls from
your mother and/or boyfriend, the tangerine-colored drink you spilled on that new
girl’s micro-minidress, and best of all, the drunk-dials you made to your grade
school crush, your fifteen ex-boyfriends, and everyone in between. It allows
you to (1) rip off your saintly image (if you actually have one), (2) do your
nasty bad girl deeds, and (3) blame everything on Pareng Jose, who poured himself
down your throat.

However,
alcohol is the biggest traitor of all. It never gives fair warning. One minute
you’re being your fun, flirty and uninhibited self, and the next thing you see
is the funky-scented inside of a plastic bag. Or the bright glare of sunlight
bouncing off the parking lot pavement, spearing your tired eyes and
reverberating in your head like a toddler with a bad sugar high and an
extra-bouncy Pilates ball. No heads-up, no warning bells. Just one silly girl
who can’t hold her liquor — the very archetype of the ditzy sorority girl you
never thought you’d be.

So I blame
you, alcohol, you backstabbing bitch. I blame you for one million bad
decisions, for incurable day-after headaches, and probably half a dozen
incriminating pictures. But we have a love-hate thing, you and I. We swear off
each other time and again, but like in any dysfunctional friendship, when the
going gets rough we always find ourselves in each others’ arms.

“I wish I
knew how to quit you…”

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 14th, 2008 at 7:38 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.